NAVIGATING ARGUMENTS WITH YOUR WIFE: 4-STEPS TO BRING YOU CLOSER TOGETHER

Gentlemen, if you’re upset and about to get angry, it’s a good idea to take some time out.

This is really important as you won’t be able to create the safety required to achieve a desirable outcome if you’re hot headed.

Just let her know that you’re taking space to calm down and would like to have a conversation when you clear your mind..

Once that’s sorted follow these 4 steps to navigate the argument in a way that will bring you closer together.

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1. Ladies First

Let her vent her frustrations first.

If you’re able to hold space for your wife to express her emotions and just listen you’ve done 80% of the job.

When you have the courage to listen and acknowledge the way she feels you’re helping her release her stress, this will instantly begin to diffuse the tension.

It’s natural for you to want to avoid this step, problem solve or disagree…

Resist trying to ‘fix’ things and remind yourself that you're helping her to relax and balance her emotions. Once she settles down you’ll be her hero - simply for being present.

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2. Validate Your Mate

Validate her feelings by rephrasing what she’s saying.

Do this regardless of if her points are valid or slightly insane, this exercise isn’t about right and wrong but to reinforce that you’ve listened and understood her perspective.

This will disarm her, allowing her to come back to herself by creating safety in her body that you’re strong enough to witness her distress.

She’s now in a calmer, more emotionally balanced state to tend to your needs.

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3. Closing The Deal

Now that you’ve helped her reduce her stress, made her feel safe and understood it's time to close the deal. This is where you can negotiate, problem solve or simply close the case depending on the nature of the dispute.

Scenario A: If you’ve done something to upset her and you’re in the wrong -

Ask her what you can do for her now to make it better or to prevent upsetting her in the future.

Scenario B: If you’ve done something to upset her but you haven’t done anything wrong -

Make it clear that you haven’t, while focusing on validating her feelings and that it was never your intention, ask her how you can make her feel better in this moment.

Scenario C: If you are disagreeing on a situation; she wants one thing and you want another -

This is a good time to help her understand why it’s important to you and how you can make it work for both your needs.

The key here is not to try and please her but help her to feel safe so that she trusts whatever it is you are wanting to do.

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4. Gold Medal

Now that she’s dropped her guard, expressed her feelings, felt validated by you, allowing you to close the argument with a win/win outcome…

You’ve just been through an emotionally charged experience and landed safely.

This is a great opportunity to connect, create more chemistry and feel closer than ever.

You can do this when you understand her ‘Love Language’ so you can give her love in the way she receives it.

For example if she appreciated gifts – pop out and buy her favorite flowers.

If she is a ‘quality time’ lady – make a plan for a date night.

By this stage you’ll understand why you’ve done all this work and what’s in it for you…

Women instinctively feel the urge to reciprocate.

When you make her feel safe, respected, loved and protected - she’ll naturally make you feel like a king.

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DO YOU WANT PERSONAL SUPPORT NAVIGATING YOUR RELATIONSHIP?

If you’re a man who wants more connection in your marriage, to avoid divorce and experience the love of lasting partnership...

The Mind Heart Method might be right for you.

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Apply Now.

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Much Love,

Sasha

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